TulipGirl

You may (or may not) have seen the call to boycott Homeschool Blogger/The Old Schoolhouse because of their ongoing, outspoken support for Michael and Debi Pearl’s materials, specificly their extra-biblical parenting teachings. This attention is a result of a little boy who died at the hands of his mother. The mother had sought guidance from the Pearls’ materials.

For quick reference, here are some articles that may illustrate the grave concerns people have about what Michael and Debi Pearl teach.

Here at TulipGirl:
On the Pearls and Parenting
Pearls Po-Russki
Biblical Relationships or Behaviourism
Children, Good and Grown

Offsite:
Authoritarianism and Isolationism Among Us (small type, worth the effort of reading)
The Pearls: The Basics, On Original Sin
To Train Up A Child Review
TTUAC: One Family’s Experiences
Chapter-by-Chapter Review of TTUAC
Avoiding Millstones
TTUAC Short Review

Other Related Blog Posts:
An Alternative to HSB
Click-and-Go Boycott Guide
I’m Okay, You’re Okay
Enough

I guess my worms on the lanai aren’t enough.

The boys have been wanting to get a pet again. They came across an online game in which you try to keep your fish alive and breed them to come up with new fish. (Which brought up its own set of questions. . .) They’ve been been pouring over a library book on aquarium fish for several days.

Fish are easy, right? Easy and possibly not quick to kill? We had goldfish when the boys were toddlers, and it was the nasty Midland water that got to them. Honest, it wasn’t me.

So today we ventured out and chose a betta. The type that is supposed to thrive in a smallish environment without all the fancy set ups that non-pet-people like me can handle. (Also read: cheap.)

The boys had quite the time choosing a name.

C5′s first suggestion was “Bubbly.” That was quickly shot down. Soon after, though, the boys had narrowed it down to naming our betta after a Greek god.

“Who was the Greek god of war? What was his name? You know, the Romans called him Mars. . .” J9 asked. I couldn’t remember. Honestly, all the Greek deities kind of blend together for me, and it has been over a year since we studied ancient Greece. Finally someone piped up, “Ares!”

T8 recommended Poseidon. Then started the lively debate over whether Ares or Poseidon was the most appropriate name for our little betta. R7 was in favor of Ares. “I can never remember how to say the other guy’s name!” J9 argued against Ares, even though he recommended that name. “Sure he was the god of war, but if he got hurt, he just ran away.”

I was silently rooting for Poseidon.

It was a lively 10 minute debate before settling on something they mutally agreed upon. The consensus? Poseidon. But his full name is Poseidon Ares B_____.

Oh, did I mention the boys named R7′s cactus? Spike George B_____.

“Unlike animals, which generally become self-reliant shortly after birth, the human infant remains dependent on others for a very long time. He comes into the world as a bundle of needs, relying totally on the warmth of human arms, watchful eyes, and tender caresses. Incubators and electric heat are merely a very inadequate substitute for human contact, and the touch of cold instruments can be torture. A baby requires the certainty that he will be protected in every situation, that his arrival is desired, that his cries are heard, that the movements of his eyes are repsonded to and his fears calmed. The baby needs assurance that his hunger and thirst will be satisfied, his body lovingly cared for, and his distress never ignored.”

–Alice Miller, the opening paragraph of the preface to “Banished Knowledge”

“If you want to look at how infants point us toward the reality of sin, I think most adults need to quit picking at the sliver in the baby’s eye and start with the plank in their own. Here’s a secret, (very sarcastic tone), babies are so demanding because if they weren’t, their selfish, sinful parents would let them starve rather than interrupt their own activities to feed and nurture them. Really, what would happen to most infants if they never fussed or demanded attention? I think most adults would leave them alone and only interact with them when it was convenient.”

–Magan

“Can a woman forget her nursing child,
that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb?
Even these may forget,
yet I will not forget you.

Isaiah 49:15, via Heather

So far we’ve had a wonderful, relaxing, fun spring break. *grin* The boys have gone swimming every day, in spite of the water being frigid. We went to Dinosaur World in Plant City on Tuesday. It was very kid-friendly, and for those who are local, they’ll be having discounted tickets for homeschoolers throughout the month of May. I took a lot of pics with my ancient Nikon (which I love, but doesn’t have the instant gratification of digital. . .) I might get photos up later this week, though.

Yesterday we went to the beach on Anna Maria Island. Went with a friend I’ve known since our boys were babies together, 9+ years ago. We laughed at how uptight we were there, but thinking we were relaxed and had it all together. And we talked about how gracious God is. . . Lots and lots of good talking. Haven’t had a “girlfriend” type talk like that in awhile. Between the two of us we have six boys. Lots of fun, lots of energy. And they were wonderful and didn’t get too sunburned.

I’ve fallen asleep around 9pm each night. And haven’t woken until 9am. I think I really have needed the rest.

We’ve also made a couple trips to the library. We’ve been avoiding it because of library fines. *blush* Yes, I have a payment plan with my local library because of overdue fees. And yes, we borrowed Hubby’s card for our library excursions this week.

I haven’t gotten anywhere close to the around-the-house projects I wanted to tackle. In fact, I bought strawberries while we were in Plant City and we’re munching on them instead of making jam. Ahh, well. I’m hoping we’ll actually scrub down the vehicles inside and out tomorrow, but if we don’t. . . they’ll survive.

I have a bit of a stomach bug or something and feel kinda nasty.

I think I need to sip some peppermint tea.

I’ve known both of these women for years, and both are fairly new to blogging. Maybe I’ve just been extra hormonal this week, or maybe they just know how to write in ways that touch my heart–but I’ve had tears reading each of their blogs this week.

Debra Baker: Opineaway
ColoradoColumbine: UkrColumbine

Well, I’ve been afraid of changing
‘Cause I’ve built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Even children get older
And I’m getting older too
Oh I’m getting older too

Happy birthday, Mom.

Q. 2. What rule hath God given to direct us how we may glorify and enjoy him?

A. The Word of God, which is contained in the Scriptures of the Old and New Testaments, is the only rule to direct us how we may glorify and enjoy him.

which is contained in the Scriptures
Matt. 19:4-5 with Gen. 2:24; Luke 24:27, 44; I Cor. 2:13; 14:37;
II Pet.1:20-21; 3:2, 15-16

the only rule to direct us
Deut. 4:2; Ps. 19:7-11; Isa. 18:20; John 15:11; 20:30-31; Acts 17:11;
II Tim. 3:15-17; I John 1:4

(via OPC/CRTA)

Three times I actually cried while reading blogs today.

Real tears are rare enough. Three time, though?

about a baby

a sister

and a hooker

Hooray! Spring break is here! And unlike the crazy college students who fly down to Florida for spring break, I always get to live here and enjoy the sunshine. *eg*

One of the differences between homeschooling and having the boys in school is the increased appreciation I have for vacations and holidays.

Right now J9 is swimming laps in the pool. Now, it’s waaaaay too freezing for me to swim, but he’s a tough kid and loves the water.

Our Spring Break plans include a around-the-house project each day. (Ahhh, yes, I’m the queen of procrastinating when it comes to these things) and an fun outing.

Today we washed the inside walls in the house. We tend to get lots of fingerprints, footprints, and various banging prints on the walls of our home. The boys wiped them down, and I followed up with the Mr. Clean eraser. I love that cleaning tool. The next time I send a goodie box to my missionary friends, I’m sending Mr. Clean erasers.

We also went to see the Curious George movie and ate Curious George snacks, thanks to my Mom’s suggestion. And I took a long afternoon nap. Okay, maybe not the boys’ idea of fun during Spring Break, but it definitely works for me. *grin*

This Week’s Projects:
Sweep and Scrub the Lanai
Make Strawberry Jam
Weed and Mulch the Front Yard
Clothes–Give Away, Dry Clean, Launder, Organize
ReOrganize Kitchen, Store Hurricane Supplies
Clean Desk/Organize Bills
Clean Car/Van Inside/Out
Dust Everything, Especially Fans

This Week’s Fun:
The Library–T7 has been begging and begging to go to the library. I in my post-Ukraine excitement, overused the library when we returned to the tune of impressive overdue fines. So, the library has been avoided of late.
Dinosaur World
U-Pic Strawberries
The Beach
Reread the Chronicles of Narnia
G-Wiz
Living Room Forts
Florida Air Show, maybe

. . . Speak in tongues.

Q. 1. What is the chief end of man?

A. Man

2 Comments »

It broke my heart to read this today.

I have seen within the Christian subculture a lot of very well-meaning abuse at the hands of loving parents. Parents who don’t want to be and don’t intend to be abusive. A lot of what I’ve seen is due to the emphasis on “being consistent.” While the Pearls and others teach that “being consistent” will mean fewer spankings, what the reality is in many families and for many children is that “consistent” spankings results in very freqent, increasingly harder, spankings.

I’ve been in conversations with mothers, worrying about whether bruises on bottoms would show. If CPS would be called. If a trip to the pediatrician should be changed. And these were loving mothers, who in general were gentle and soft-spoken. But the repeated teachings of spank ‘em, and spank ‘em harder until they obey did result in what could objectively only be labeled abuse.

Anyway, this whole very sad situation reminds me of an article I once read, and that all those who give advice, write books, or encourage others in Christian parenting should read.

Avoiding Millstones.

Be Thou my Vision, O Lord of my heart;
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art
Thou my best Thought, by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light.

Be Thou my Wisdom, and Thou my true Word;
I ever with Thee and Thou with me, Lord;
Thou my great Father, I Thy true son;
Thou in me dwelling, and I with Thee one.

Be Thou my battle Shield, Sword for the fight;
Be Thou my Dignity, Thou my Delight;
Thou my soul

1 Comment »

A lot of this comes down to how the Gospel is viewed, and the position of Children in the Church and how the Gospel applies to Children.

I believe that Jesus Christ died on the cross not only for me, but also for my children. I believe that the Gospel applies to them as much as it does to me. I believe the Bible teaches this–and even Christ does. We all know the passage where Jesus says, “Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them. . .”

I believe Christ paid the penalty for my children’s sins on the cross. When my children sin–I want to point them to the One who has already been punished for their sin. When my children sin (and they do–I do not have a weak view of sin)–I come alongside them, confront them with the ugly reality of sin in their lives, and help them repent. I pray that the Holy Spirit softens their hearts and enables them to truly repent. We pray together. We ask for God’s grace to do the right thing.

I do discipline. I help them form habits of right behaviour. I teach them right from wrong. I correct them. One of the most powerful passages on child discipline in the Bible is Duet 6:4-7:

Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.

That constant presence is the heart of discipleship, the heart of discipline.

See also:
The Heart of Grace

. . .At the last checkpoint we took the kids out and witnessed eight soldiers melt. behind cammo and guns – eyes softened at the sight of an infant in tyedye and a little blonde barefoot shirtless girl playing in the dirt. when it was fine to leave we herad over and over “thank you my friend, thank you my friend”. –mountain mama