Hubby’s book, Knox’s Irregulars, is now available on Amazon! I’m really proud of him (as any wife would be.) But, really, his book is GOOD. The first draft was written nearly 11 years ago, when we were in Russian language school. It was revised in Ukraine, and put on the back burner when he was in grad school. But now, it’s published!

Go over to Amazon and buy it. . . just $2.99 for the Kindle edition. (It will soon be available in paperback, as well as on Barnes and Noble for Nook.) If you don’t have a Kindle, you can download a free Kindle app for your smart phone or computer.

It’s a good book. . . Check it out. . . Over on Amazon, you can read the first few chapters for free. (Then you’ll want to read the rest of it. *grin*)

This is the book I wish had been published twenty years ago.

I’ve made plenty of mistakes as a mother, and I know I’ll make plenty more. Yet each year the Lord seems to help me see more clearly my need for the grace of the Gospel in my life and in my parenting. I’ve discussed with friends, with my pastor, at church potlucks, “What does it look like to reflect the Gospel in our parenting relationships?”

Increasingly these discussions of the Gospel and grace in parenting are taking place among moms in playgroups, in churches, on blogs.

But very few books have been published that really address this question in a fundamental way; very few books to pass along to friends and to say, “Hey, this really encouraged me to look to the grace of the Gospel as a mom.”

Enter Elyse Fitzpatrick and her daughter Jessica. (What a perk, writing as a team! One with the wisdom of experience, one with the fresh “this is what it feels like in the trenches” perspective.)

Key points that I really like about this book:

* Give them Grace differentiates between moralism and the Gospel: “Mormons, Muslims, and moralistic atheists all share the belief that law can perfect us, but Christians don’t. Christians know that the law can’t save us; what we need is a Savior.”

* It warns against formulaic parenting: “Giving grace to our children is not another formula that guarantees their salvation or obedience. Grace-parenting is not another law for you to master to perfect your parenting or your children.”

* It encourages going back to the what Christ has done (and often quotes one of my favorite books, The Jesus Storybook Bible), “please stop for a moment and ask yourself what percentage of your time is spent in declaring the rules and what percentage in reciting the Story.”

* It keeps reaffirming the centrality of the Gospel in all of Scripture, in all of life, “Parenting methods that assume or ignore the gospel are not Christian. The gospel must hold the center in all we think, do, and say with our kids.”

* It reminds us that we, as parents, need the Gospel, too: “In our hearts we know that’s true because the law hasn’t made us good, either, has it?”

* The questions for reflection at the end of each chapter really ARE good for reflection, not just “learn the answer, fill in the blanks”.

* Appendix Two: Common Problems and the Gospel. This is an excellent resource for helping parents re-frame their thinking and answer “What does it look like to reflect the Gospel in our parenting relationships?” Of course, considering the chart format, parents could slip into formulaic parenting. But it is more valuable as a resource than a harm, in my opinion.

That said, this isn’t quite the book that I hoped it would be. There are two main concerns that I have.

* I really wish this book had addressed children in the Covenant, and the theological implications of that. While I understand that this discussion would change the book and change the target audience, I had hoped this would have been at least discussed in part. Some of the sample conversations in the book between parent and child would have likely been a bit different had aspects of covenant theology been included.

* Give them Grace seems to lose sight of the fullness of what Christ has done when discussing punishment. I am disturbed by this sample conversation, “I am sad that I have to cause you pain. I know that you are sad too. I pray that you will understand that disobedience always causes pain. In fact, our disobedience caused the pain that Jesus felt on the cross, even though he had always perfectly obeyed and didn’t deserve to be punished.”

In effect, this sample conversation nullifies the punishment Christ bore on the cross for our sins and our children’s sins. It is communicating to the child, “even though Jesus paid for your sins, it wasn’t enough and you must be punished as well”. This seems to undermine the overarching theme of the book. “I have to cause you pain. . .” even though Jesus already took the punishment for your sin?

This isn’t a “to spank or not to spank” question, please don’t misunderstand me. Christians of good conscience and careful study of the Bible parent both with spanking and without spanking.

The issue is a theological one of equating the punishment of a child with the punishment of Christ, and communicating to the child that they MUST be punished — undermines how we communicate Christ’s full punishment for us. . . even their sins as little children.

In spite of these two concerns, I do give this book 5-stars and recommend it to Christian parents.

I remember some of the first parenting books I read twenty years ago, pulling them off the shelf when I was babysitting, reading them after the kids were in bed. Sadly, these Christian parenting books were devoid of the Gospel. They framed the parenting relationship for me in a way that led me to lose track of what was really important as a mother.

That has changed. “This is why you need Jesus, this is why Mommy needs Jesus. . .” these are the conversations I’ve been having through the years with my children. . . slowly, growing to this place of giving my children the Gospel of grace. . . imperfectly.

If only this book had been on the shelf 20 years ago. . .

This is what I’ve read so far this year. I’m including those I’ve started but not finished yet, too.

1. Spiritual Nourishment:
Sacred Rhythms: Arranging Our Lives for Spiritual Transformation, Ruth Haley Barton
By His Wounds We Are Healed, Wendy Alsup
Covenant of Grace, John Murray

2. Family Husbandry:
Give them Grace, Elyse Fitzpatrick
The Well-Trained Mind: A Guide to Classical Education at Home (Revised and Updated 10th Anniversary Edition), Susan Wise Bauer

3. Read-Alouds:
Praying through the 100 Gateway Cities of the 10/40 Window
Peril and Peace, Withrow
Monks and Mystics, Withrow

4. Biographic:
David Livingstone: Missionary and Explorer, Sam Wellman
The River of Grace: The Story of John Calvin, Joyce McPherson

5. Modern Lit:

6. Nonprofit:

7. Self Care:
One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are, Ann Voskamp

8. Historic:
The History of the Ancient World: From the Earliest Accounts to the Fall of Rome, Susan Wise Bauer
The History of the Medieval World: From the Conversion of Constantine to the First Crusade, Susan Wise Bauer

9. The Church Body
Peril and Peace, Withrow
Monks and Mystics, Withrow

10. Africa:
The Fate of Africa: A History of Fifty Years of Independence, Martin Meredith
When a Crocodile Eats the Sun: A Memoir of Africa, Peter Godwin
Mukiwa, Peter Godwin
White Masaai (didn’t finish, don’t recommend)
African Friends and Money Matters: Observations from Africa (Publications in Ethnography, Vol. 37), David Maranz

11. Other:
Mama, PhD
Once a Spy, Keith Thomson
A Princess of Landover, Terry Brooks
Artemis Fowl, Eoin Colfer
The Arctic Incident, Eoin Colfer
Hunger Games Trilogy

This is what I’ve read so far this year. I’m including those I’ve started but not finished yet, too.

1. Spiritual Nourishment:
Sacred Rhythms: Arranging Our Lives for Spiritual Transformation, Ruth Haley Barton

2. Family Husbandry:
The Well-Trained Mind: A Guide to Classical Education at Home (Revised and Updated 10th Anniversary Edition), Susan Wise Bauer

3. Read-Alouds:
Praying through the 100 Gateway Cities of the 10/40 Window

4. Biographic:
David Livingstone: Missionary and Explorer, Sam Wellman
The River of Grace: The Story of John Calvin, Joyce McPherson

5. Modern Lit:

6. Nonprofit:

7. Self Care:
One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are, Ann Voskamp

8. Historic:
The History of the Ancient World: From the Earliest Accounts to the Fall of Rome, Susan Wise Bauer
The History of the Medieval World: From the Conversion of Constantine to the First Crusade, Susan Wise Bauer

9. The Church Body

10. Africa:
The Fate of Africa: A History of Fifty Years of Independence, Martin Meredith
When a Crocodile Eats the Sun: A Memoir of Africa, Peter Godwin
African Friends and Money Matters: Observations from Africa (Publications in Ethnography, Vol. 37), David Maranz

11. Other:
Mama, PhD
Once a Spy, Keith Thomson
A Princess of Landover, Terry Brooks
Artemis Fowl, Eoin Colfer
The Arctic Incident, Eoin Colfer

I’m going to choose 11 categories, and choose a handful of books from each to read (and review?) this year. Some are ones that I’ve started and want to finish, or have been recommended, or have caught my eye. I also log my books now on Goodreads (thanks to Kristen! And of course, I’m TulipGirl there, too.) I’m open to recommendations! I’ll probably use this as a starting point and modify it over time. I have no pretenses that I will actually READ all of these, this is simply a way to prioritize, stay well-rounded in my reading, and see how far I get.

1. Spiritual Nourishment:
Prof. Horner’s Bible Reading Plan (modified, I’m a little slower)
Morning Thoughts, Octavius Winslow
Evening Thoughts, Octavius Winslow
A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World

2. Family Husbandry:
Peacemaking for Families, Ken Sande
Parenting Is Your Highest Calling: And Eight Other Myths That Trap Us in Worry and Guilt, Leslie Leyland Fields
The Joy of Parenting, Lisa Coyne and Amy Murrell
Spiritual Parenting: An Awakening for Today’s Families, Michelle Anthony
The Science of Parenting, Margot Sunderland

3. Read-Alouds:
Praying through the 100 Gateway Cities of the 10/40 Window
Unbroken: A World War II Story of Survival, Resilience, and Redemption, Laura Hillenbrand
Missionary Heroism, John Lambert (free, google books)
Whatever You Do, Don’t Run: True Tales of a Botswana Safari Guide
The Safari Companion: A Guide to Watching African Mammals, Richard Estes

4. Biographic:
From Jerusalem to Irian Jaya: A Biographical History of Christian Missions
Unbroken: A World War II Story of Survival, Resilience, and Redemption, Laura Hillenbrand
Unbowed: A Memoir, Wangari Maathai

5. Modern Lit:
The Tale of Murasaki: A Novel, Liza Dalby
Wolf Hall, Hilary Mantel
A Change in Altitude: A Novel, Anita Shreve
Cutting for Stone: A novel, Abraham Verghese
A Bend in the River, V.S. Naipaul
Heart of Darkness, Joseph Conrad
The In-Between World of Vikram Lall

6. Nonprofit:
When Helping Hurts: Alleviating Poverty Without Hurting the Poor. . .and Yourself
The Networked Nonprofit: Connecting with Social Media to Drive Change, Beth Kanter
The White Man’s Burden: Why the West’s Efforts to Aid the Rest Have Done So Much Ill and So Little Good

7. Self Care:
One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are, Ann Voskamp
Real Love for Real Life: The Art and Work of Caring, Andi Ashworth
Getting Things Done: The Art of Stress-Free Productivity, David Allen
Eat to Live, Joel Fuhrman

8. Historic:
From Jerusalem to Irian Jaya: A Biographical History of Christian Missions, Ruth Tucker
The History of the Ancient World: From the Earliest Accounts to the Fall of Rome, Susan Wise Bauer
The History of the Medieval World: From the Conversion of Constantine to the First Crusade, Susan Wise Bauer
Daughters of the Church, Ruth Tucker

9. The Church Body
The Supper of the Lamb: A Culinary Reflection, Robert Farrar Capon
The Next Christendom: The Coming of Global Christianity, Philip Jenkins
Real Sex: The Naked Truth about Chastity, Lauren Winner

10. Africa:
The Fate of Africa: A History of Fifty Years of Independence, Martin Meredith
From Dust to Snow: The African Dream?, Wilfed Ngwa, Lydia Ngwa
A Change in Altitude: A Novel, Anita Shreve
Cutting for Stone: A novel, Abraham Verghese
Africa Rising: How 900 Million African Consumers Offer More Than You Think
A Bend in the River, V.S. Naipaul
Heart of Darkness, Joseph Conrad
The Shadow of the Sun
Don’t Let’s Go to the Dogs Tonight: An African Childhood, Alexandra Fuller
West with the Night, Beryl Markham
Unbowed: A Memoir, Wangari Maathai
The Safari Companion: A Guide to Watching African Mammals, Richard Estes
The In-Between World of Vikram Lall
The White Nile
Whatever You Do, Don’t Run: True Tales of a Botswana Safari Guide

11. Other:
Mama, PhD
When Children Love to Learn: A Practical Application of Charlotte Mason’s Philosophy for Today, Elaine Cooper
The Shallows: What the Internet Is Doing to Our Brains, Nicholas Carr

To summarize: Projects for 2009

.

Connecting in Community Project
I feel like this project was a success. . . Even though we’ve had the spectre of moving looming, we’ve become more integrated in our church, our neighborhood, and community. We’ve been in the same house for almost 5 years — the longest I’ve ever lived in one town, not to mention one house, ever in my life. I have especially loved being part of a women’s Bible study, not just for the community aspects but also for how much focus the women put into really delving into the Bible.

.

Calvin Quincentenary Project
The boys read through two Calvin biographies, and I read through half of one. *blush* I listened to a significant portion of the Institutes of the Christian Religion on MP3 and was so nourished by that. As Hubby received Calvin’s complete commentaries for Christmas, I think we’ll need to continue this project in another form next year.

.

Homeschool Habits Project
Homeschooling has gone great this year! We’re using Ambleside Online as the spine of our studies, with the boys all in the same time period but different requirements for reading and writing. We wanted to devote significant time to US related studies when we returned to the States and I feel we’ve done that well. The older boys have also become involved in debate, and that has been a great addition to our schooling (and a great motivation for them, as well.)

.

Regular Reading Project
I still haven’t kept up with George W., Half-Pint Megan, Civil Staci or Classical Kristen. . . but I have read more this year. Getting back to regular reading, but didn’t do many reviews.

.

Family Fitness Project
Fail. . . no family 5k.

.

More Music Project
While we did have “more” music, we didn’t quite have as much as I had envisioned. No piano, but T12 does have a guitar and C9 a harmonica. No live concerts, but did see The Nutcracker.

.

And while I have been formulating and contemplating my 2010 projects, they are still a bit amorphous. Will post them as I flesh them out a bit more.

How can it be a large career to tell other people’s children about [arithmetic], and a small career to tell one’s own children about the universe? How can it be broad to be the same thing to everyone, and narrow to be everything to someone? No; a woman’s function is laborious because it is gigantic, not because it is minute.

–G.K. Chesterton

(Via Chris)

Sometimes theology isn’t perceived to be a proper girlie pursuit. And yet, we as Believers are called to study, think, discuss, writing, meditate — all with the purpose of knowing our God and walking with Him intimately.

A couple of weeks ago a friend mentioned the book Practical Theology for Women. She pointed out the cover reminded her of our shared online community, a place where women regularly gather to discuss and work out the practical implications of the Gospel in our family lives.

So when my birthday came around and I splurged (imagine, a pocketful of Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Borders gift cards!), I impulsively bought this book. I probably wouldn’t have bought it just based on the title and summary, but the pretty cover didn’t gave me a happy feeling and Rebecca gave it a five star review.

Wow. . . that’s a lot of background for why I bought a book. . . *L* And to think, I meant this to be a short book review!

.

When I first opened the Amazon box and saw Practical Theology for Women: How Knowing God Makes a Difference in Our Daily Lives, I was a tad disappointed. The book is such a slim little volume and when buying books new, I feel like I want to really get something substantial. Yet that disappointment quickly evaporated as I began to read.

Wendy Alsup has written a brief, accessible, but meaty introduction to theology for girls. She begins by giving a sketch of why she studies and teaches theology to women, along with a glimpse of the struggles in her life and how the Lord has carried her. She gives both a definition of theology and brief apologetic for why women should study theology. In a nutshell, she writes what my heart knows — the study of God and His attributes compels my heart to worship. Theological pursuits enable me to rest in the Lord.

The chapters are short, perfect in length for daily devotionals. Alsup is free with referencing Scripture, not just giving chapter and verse, but also quoting at length the relevant passages. Several things spoke to my soul within the first few chapters. (Oh, how I need to remember, refocus, and abide in the Lord!) But it also brought to mind some things Hubby’s mom is walking through right now, and I wanted to share this book with her before she leaves town tomorrow. I decided to read the book quickly, in order to give it to her for her trip.

Truthfully, though, this book is better read in bite-sized bits. As a devotional, as a prompt for meditation — each chapter addresses an attribute of God or the reality of His presence in our lives. The ideas are simple — but not simplistic. For those who are newly walking with the Lord or scared by the term “theology,” Practical Theology for Women is an excellent foundational Bible study. For those who have been walking with the Lord for years and perhaps are already convinced of the value of theology, this book provides a means for refocusing on the basics of our walk with the Lord.

One of the things I liked best about this book is that it would be easy to use in a one-on-one discipleship context, a small group Bible study, or just to pass along to a friend. Already there are several women in my life I know would find it encouraging to their faith and I’ve given my copy of Practical Theology for Women to my mother-in-law. Overall, I give this book a 5/5 rating.

That said, had I been Alsup’s editor, I would have suggested two small changes. First, I would have edited the chapter that focused on “being ruled by emotions” to communicate the value of the emotions God has given us. Secondly, I would have provided a short “For more study” bibliography in the back for those who would like to take the next step in theological study.

Speaking of. . . which Theology for Girls resources would you recommend?

My friend Megan, she of four girls to match my four boys, has had the fun of not only taking classes with Prof. Barrs, but also reorganizing his library! How cool! And, she gets to give away a copy of his new book.

Yes, I’m blogging on this ’cause I want Megan to send me the book. But not just that. . . I’m sure this will be a thought-provoking book of interest to many of y’all who stop by TulipGirl.

Eleven years and four babies later, I started back at the local university a few semesters ago. With Hubby in school, and the boys homeschooling, it just seemed like the right time for me to start back. The boys have been my biggest cheerleaders, and we’ve had the fun of all sitting around the dining room table doing math homework. They’ve also been tolerant of the end-of-semester push to finish papers and study for finals, even when that’s meant a grumpy mommy.

We’re still working on our plans for the boys’ homeschool year, but I’m registered for classes and begin next week — Cognitive Psychology, Developmental Psychology, Religion in America and Bible (Old Testament) as Literature. See a theme? I’ve been focusing on the intersection of psychology and theology (even though the local uni doesn’t exactly offer much direction there.) At this point, I’m on track to graduate in December. (!) Blogging tends to go by the wayside during the semester, though. . .

The women’s Bible study at our church is going through Judges and Daniel. It seems like it is an excellent complement / counterpoint to the classes I’m taking. Even though I’m not able to go every week, this Bible study has been just what I’ve needed. And between the Bible study and the OT as Lit class, I’m starting to read through the OT, something I confess I haven’t done in years. This morning I woke up before the alarm clock, and it was as if the Lord were nudging me. . . Go on. . . spend some time in the Word now. . .. It was good.

“Even while a boy he began to study with his pen in his hand; not for the purpose of copying off the thoughts of others, but for the purpose of writing down, and preserving, the thought suggested to his own mind. . . . This most useful practice . . . he steadily pursued in all his studies through life. His pen appears to have been always in his hand. From this practice . . . he derived the very great advantages of thinking continually during each period of study; of thinking accurately; of thinking connectedly; of thinking habitually at all times . . . of pursuing each given subject of thought as far as he was able . . . of preserving his best thoughts, associations, and images, and then arranging them under their proper heads, ready for subsequent use; of regularly strengthening the faculty of thinking and reasoning, by constant and powerful exercise; and above all of gradually molding himself into a thinking being. . .” (Works, I, xviii)

“Mommy, what is sex?”

I gulped. I so did not want to have this conversation. The boys know some basics of the birds and the bees, but in general we’ve gone with a slow, natural progression of talking about this topic.

I stayed calm. “So, where did you hear that word?”

“Right there. . .” He pointed to the bookshelf. “The Joy of Sects.”

I didn’t see anything on the packing slip to clue me in. . . Did someone send me a surprise from Amazon?

(Thanks for the encouragement to post, Kristen and MbG Reading Circle!)

Last year I posted a book list, inspired by Kristen’s encouragement to PLAN our reading and SHARE the good and not-so-good books. I really like reading book summaries from others, and Kristen’s and Meagan’s are among my favorites. True confession: I didn’t read a SINGLE one of these books cover to cover (though I skimmed most–and did read and skim others not listed there.)

Then, there is always my Amazon list–which is more of a “books and stuff that caught my eye” than it is an actual WISH list. Still, it keeps track of the books I’d like to check out from the library or read or skim. Many of the ones I’ve recently added are from my friends sharing what they are planning on reading this year.

Most of all, this year I’d like to spend more time reading from paper pages and less time reading from screens, as diber says.

2008 Hope-To-Read List

1. Care for the Soul: Exploring the Intersection of Psychology & Theology

2. Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers
by Gordon Neufeld

3. Rediscovering Catechism: The Art of Equipping Covenant Children
by Donald Van Dyken

4. When Sinners Say “I Do”: Discovering the Power of the Gospel for Marriage
by Dave Harvey

5. Nurturing children in the Lord: A study guide for teachers on developing a Biblical approach to discipline
by Jack Fennema

6. Blankets
by Craig Thompson

7. Gilead: A Novel
by Marilynne Robinson

8. Foucault’s Pendulum
by Umberto Eco

9. The Supper of the Lamb: A Culinary Reflection (Modern Library Paperbacks)
by Robert Farrar Capon

10. The Omnivore’s Dilemma: A Natural History of Four Meals
by Michael Pollan

11. The Child in Christian Thought (Religion, Marriage, and Family)

12. Dealing With Disappointment: Helping Kids Cope When Things Don’t Go Their Way
by Elizabeth Crary

13. Romancing the Difference: Kenneth Burke, Bob Jones University, and the Rhetoric of Religious Fundamentalism (Studies in Rhetoric and Religion)
by Camille Kaminski Lewis

14. Marks of His Wounds: Gender Politics and Bodily Resurrection
by Beth Felker Jones

What are you planning/hoping to read this year?

This post is copied whole-cloth from Megan at Half Pint House. I had to visit her site from the library today to access it, and I really want to keep a copy easy to find online (in case her site ever goes down.) I’m copying her explanation and commentary, so those who see this booklist understand the context.

Jerram Barr’s Booklist for Children

Filed under: Books & Culture — Megan at 8:15 pm on Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Jerram Barrs is a highly respected professor here at Covenant and Craig has the amazing opportunity to be his teaching assistant beginning this summer. Last fall, Craig took one of his classes in which he handed out a list of his favorite books for children and I’m posting it here, for others to see, and also so I’ll have an electronic version of it for future reference.

From Jerram: These are books most of which I read to our sons, and/or books I or they read as kids or as teens – with a few exceptions of more recently published books that I am discovering for myself, our sons and our grandchildren. I love to read good children’s books as some of the most creative writing and illustrating is done for children. The test of a well-written book is whether it is a pleasure to read it aloud. All children are different, and this is good – one may be ready to hear Narnia at 3, another not until 6 or 7, so don’t be bothered by this. All children like good illustrations, and all children like the rhymes, rhythms and sounds of verse. Make reading to them a habit at an early age and they will learn to love to read themselves. Many good books have filmed versions – occasionally I have noted these as a movie or TV series may be a helpful way to introduce children to a new level of literature. Books are listed as I thought of them, not in any systematic order. I have omitted many delightful books like those by Dr. Seuss with which most people are familiar. Happy reading!

C. S. Lewis:
The Chronicles of Narnia – depending on the child can be read from 3-6 and up

J. R. R. Tolkien:
The Hobbit
The Lord of the Rings – excellent films
The Silmarillion

Famer Giles of Ham
Roverandom – a story Tolkien made up for his own children

Meindert DeJong:
The House of Sixty Fathers
The Easter Cat
The Wheel on the School
Dirks’ Dog Bello & many other excellent books for 5 or 6 and up

Beatrix Potter:
The Tale of Benjamin Bunny
Peter Rabbit
Jemima Puddleduck & many others; don’t be surprised by death in her tales

Shel Silverstein:
Lafcadio, the Lion who Shot Back
The Giving Tree
Where the Sidewalk Ends – Poems and Drawings – & many others

Mary Norton:
The Borrowers – & series

Concordia Publishing:
The Arch Books – our favorite set of illustrated Bible Stories, many in verse

Catherine Vos:
Children’s Story Bible

Dick King Smith:
The Fox Busters – one of my favorite books
The Sheep Pig – also a movie ‘Babe’
The Mouse Butcher & several other wonderful books for 5 upwards

Lewis Carroll:
Through the Looking Glass
Alice in Wonderland
Jaberwocky & other poems – children love nonsense poetry

Julia Donaldson:
The Gruffalo – one of my grandchildren’s favorite books
The Gruffalo’s Child & other books for children 2 & up

Arnold Lobel:
Frog and Toad are Friends
Mouse Tales & many other good books for small children

Michael Bond:
A Bear Called Paddington & many others in series

Anne Holm:
I am David – this is one of the finest children’s books – also a good movie
The Hostage

Margaret Wise Brown:
The Velveteen Rabbit
Goodnight Moon
The Runaway Bunny – a great book, read by Dr. Calhoun for faculty devotion

Jan Brett:
Annie and the Wild Animals – a wonderful illustrator as well as story-teller
The Twelve Days of Christmas
The Umbrella
Jan Brett’s Christmas Treasury – & many others for 2 and up

Johann Wyss:
The Swiss Family Robinson – a classic & also a good movie

Captain Maryatt:
Children of the New Forest – a classic

J. M. Barrie:
Peter Pan – also a fine film

The Brothers Grimm:
Fairy Tales

Hans Christian Anderson:
Treasury of Fairy Stories

Michelle Magorian:
Goodnight Mr. Tom – one of the best books, an award winner, 8 and up

George MacDonald:
The Princess and the Curdie
The Princess and the Goblin
The Gifts of the Child Christ (2 volume set of short stories – Eerdmans)

R. D. Blackmore:
Lorna Doone

Nick Butterworth:
Percy’s Bumpy Ride – a friend from English L’Abri years ago
The Treasure Hunt – & many more, great for 2 and up

Marjorie Kinnan Rawlings:
The Yearling

Thomas Hughes:
Tom Brown’s School Days

Mary Rayner:
Garth Pig and the Ice Cream Lady – & many more, for 2 and up

Richmal Crompton:
William – almost two dozen in boys’ series, very English and lots of fun

Barbara Euphan Todd:
Worzel Gummidge – the main character is a scarecrow

John White:
The Tower of Gerburah & other stories in his series – a believer

Roald Dahl:
Danny the Champion of the World – this is a wonderful book
George’s Marvelous Medicine
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory – & many more

Rudyard Kipling:
The Jungle Book
The Second Jungle Book
Just So Stories

Ursula Leguin:
The Wizard of Earthsea
The Farthest Shore – & many others

Brian Jacques:
Mossflower
The Bellmaker
Lord Brocktree – & many more in series, wonderful books

Collections:
Tales from the Arabian Nights
The Adventures of Robin Hood – many versions incl. one by John Steinbeck
Aesop’s Fables

Tove Jansson:
Moominsummer Madness
Moominland Midwinter & others in series

Fred Gipson:
Old Yeller

Kenneth Grahame:
The Wind in the Willows

T. H. White:
The Sword in the Stone – & series, excellent
Mistress Masham’s Repose

Jonathan Swift:
Gulliver’s Travels – find an edition with good illustrations

John Bunyan:
The Pilgrim’s Progress

B. B.:
The Wizard of Boland – & several others

Charles and Mary Lamb:
Tales from Shakespeare

Anna Sewell:
Black Beauty

Enid Bagnold:
National Velvet – also a famous movie with young Elizabeth Taylor

Elizabeth Speare:
The Witch of Blackbird Pond
The Bronze Bow & many more

Frances Hodgson Burnett:
The Secret Garden – also a movie – a truly wonderful book
The Lost Prince
A Little Princess

E. Nesbitt:
The Treasure Seekers
The Railway Children – good movie version
Five Children and It

R. M. Rallantyne:
The Coral Island

Ed. Sara & Stephen Corin:
Stories for under 5’s, for 5’s, for 6’s etc. up to 10’s and over

Noel Streatfield:
White Boots
Thursday’s Child
Theater Shoes – & several others

H. F. Brinsmead:
Pastures of the Blue Crane

William Horwood:
Duncton Wood – a wonderful book

Henry Treece:
The Road to Miklagard
Viking’s Dawn & many others

Rosemary Sutcliffe:
The Eagle of the Ninth
The Rider on the White Horse – & many more excellent books

Baroness Orczy:
The Scarlet Pimpernel

Lloyd Alexander:
The Book of Three
The Black Cauldron – & many more in series

Owen Barfield:
The Silver Trumpet

Robert Louis Stevenson:
Treasure Island – this gave me nightmares for years as a child when read
Kidnapped
The Black Arrow

Ted Hughes:
How the Whale Became and Other Stories

Richard Adams:
Watership Down – this is an outstanding book
Shardik

Gerald Durrell:
My Family and Other Animals – an outstanding funny book & BBC TV series
The Bafut Beagles
Beasts in my Bed – & many more about his work collecting for zoos

Jean Lee Latham:
Carry on Mr. Bowditch – a true story & fine book

J. Meade Faulkner:
Moonfleet

Alan Garner:
Elidor

Katherine Patterson:
The Bridge to Terabithia

A. Rutgers van der Loeff:
Children of the Oregon Trail

Quentin Blake:
Clown
Nursery Rhyme Book – many others, wonderful illustrator

Patricia St. John:
Treasures of the Snow – also a movie
The Tanglewoods’ Secret
The Mystery of Pheasant Cottage
Star of Light
Twice Freed
Runaway – the author was a missionary & also a fine writer

A. A. Milne:
The House at Pooh Corner
When We Were Very Young
And Now We are Six – & others – fine Milne’s own version

Ian Seraillier:
The Silver Sword – an excellent book
There’s No Escape

Robert Siegal:
Alpha Centauri

Andrew Lang:
The Blue Fairy Book
The Violet Fairy Book – & Red, Green & many others in this series

Arthur Ransome:
Old Peter’s Russian Tales
Swallows and Amazons – & many others in this series

John Masefield:
The Box of Delights – made into an excellent BBC TV series
The Midnight Folk

Roger Lancelyn Green:
The Tale of Troy
Myths of the Norsemen
Tales of Ancient Egypt – & many other similar collections and adaptations

E. B. White:
The Trumpet of the Swan – this is my favorite of his books
Stuart Little
Charlotte’s Web

Henry Williamson:
Tarka the Otter

Barbara Sleigh:
Carbonel – & others

Scott O’Dell:
Island of the Blue Dolphins

Wilson Rawls:
Where the Red Fern Grows

Norman Hunter:
Count Backwerdz on the Carpet – & others

Laura Ingalls Wilder:
Little House on the Prairie – & the whole series

Madeleine L’Engle:
A Wrinkle in Time
A Wind in the Door
A Swiftly Tilting Planet

J. K. Rowling:
The Harry Potter Books – children of all ages love them

Edward Lear:
The Owl and the Pussycat – wonderul illustrated editions – & other works

Mother Goose:
Nursery Rhymes – find good illustrated editions, many available

Teenagers – many of these can be read earlier than the teens if your child loves to read

Stephen Lawhead:
Taliesin
Merlin
Arthur – & several other good books

Madeleine L’Engle:
The Young Unicorns – & several other good books

Homer:
The Odyssey – find a good illustrated edition, in poetry – for 10 and up
The Illiad

Seamus Heaney:
Beowulf – an excellent poetic tranlation of the Anglo-Saxon classic

Charles Kingley:
Westward Ho – & many others

Gene Stratton Porter:
The Girl of the Limberlost – one of my favorite books as a young teen
The Harvester
Freckles
Michael O’Halloran – & several other fine books, now being republished

Anne McCaffrey:
Dragonflight – & series

Jack London:
The Call of the Wild – & movie
White Fang – & others

C. S. Forrester:
Captain Hornblower – & excellent series

Paul Gallico:
The Snow Goose
The Silent Miaow
Snowflake – & many other wonderful books

Sir Walter Scott:
Ivanhoe – & many others

James Fennimore Cooper:
The Prairie
Last of the Mohicans – & several others

Charlotte Bronte:
Jane Eyre

Emily Bronte:
Wuthering Heights

Anne Bronte:
The Tenant of Wildfell Hall

Jane Austen:
Pride and Prejudice – TV series perhaps the best film adaptation of any book
Sense and Sensibility – excellent film and TV productions
Mansfield Park – filmed versions inadequate
Emma – two good films; Kate Beckinsdale the better; also Clueless!
Northanger Abbey – TV series and film
Persuasion – excellent filmed version

Charles Dickens:
Bleak House
Oliver Twist
Great Expectations
A Christmas Carol
A Tale of Two Cities -& many others

Thomas Hardy:
Under the Greenwood Tree – the only light-hearted of his novels
Tess of the D’Urbevilles – sad; others more miserable, but excellent

L. M. Montgomery:
Anne of Green Gables

Louisa May Alcott:
Little Women – & others

Mark Twain:
Huckleberry Finn
Tom Sawyer

James Herriot:
The Lord God Made Them All – & many others in series

H. Rider Haggard:
King Solomon’s Mines
Alan Quartermain
She – & others

William Shakespeare:
Henry V – start Shakespeare with this play & the outstanding movie
Much Ado about Nothing – another great movie
Romeo and Juliet – several movies including Leonardo de Caprio
Julius Caesar
Twelfth Night – fine movie with Ben Kingsley
Hamlet – great movie with Kenneth Branagh

George Orwell:
Animal Farm
1984

A. B. Patterson:
The Man from Snowy River – Australian verse story & excellent movie

Ellis Peters:
The Brother Cadfael Mysteries – about 2 dozen excellent books, also filmed with Derek Jacobi as Cadfael, a medieval Benedictine monk and sleuth – the author declared that she was converted through her character

John Donne:
Collected Poems – dean of St. Paul’s, excellent preacher and great poet

George Herbert:
Poems – a wonderful pastor and great poet

Herman Melville:
Moby Dick

Nathaniel Hawthorne:
The Scarlet Letter

Steven Crane:
The Red Badge of Courage

Edgar Allen Poe:
Tales of Mystery and Imagination

L. B. Graham:
Beyond the Summerland
Bringer of Storms – a fine series recently begun by one of our graduates!

Edgar Rice Burroughs:
The Tarzan books – well worth reading

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle:
Sherlock Holmes – many in the series

C. S. Lewis:
Out of the Silent Planet
Perelandra – excellent presentations of human glory and Satan’s temptation
That Hideous Strength – excellent science fiction series

Other good booklists:
Ambleside Online
Sonlight
Veritas Press

Sidenote: And while I respect not all families like Harry Potter, I echo Hubby’s sentiments when he says, “Enough bytes have given their lives already to endless debates over the ostensibly pagan nature of Harry Potter and his alleged ability to turn nice kids into warlocks. I’ll confine my remarks to something I wrote the other day on a blog I frequent: If your child’s grasp of Christianity is so tenuous that Harry Potter can turn him to the dark side, then you have failed in your covenant duties as a parent. Further, Hogwart’s is little more than a fanciful adaptation of British public school life. I think a much greater threat than children turning to witchcraft is that they may develop a desire to wear knickerbockers and speak in fruity little English voices. Now THAT is something to fear.”

Fadiman, A. (1998). The Spirit Catches You and You Fall Down : A Hmong Child, Her American Doctors, and the Collision of Two Cultures. New York: Farrar, Straus and Giroux, pp. 352.

Introduction

Anne Fadiman tells the story of little Lia Lee, a Hmong-American child with epilepsy, and weaves together the woof of parental love and biomedical treatment with the warp of Hmong and American cultures. The Spirit Catches You and You Fall Down : A Hmong Child, Her American Doctors, and the Collision of Two Cultures brings into focus how extensively cross-cultural transitions impact both the approaching and approached peoples.

Anne Fadiman is currently the Francis Writer in Residence, the endowed chair in nonfiction writing at Yale University, and has an extensive background in writing, teaching, and editing. Fadiman spent eight years researching and writing this book, including becoming close to Lia Lee’s family as well as the doctors and other social agency workers who were involved in this story. Her sympathy for the Hmong people and culture, as well as respect for the western medicine, provide a non-neutral point of view that is positive towards all involved. In an interview in 2001, Fadiman explains what drew her so deeply into this book, “Yes, it is about an epileptic Hmong toddler, but it is also about many other things. . . I started pulling on a slender thread, the thread that was Lia Lee, the small sick child . . . I pulled on the thread and the thread became a string and the string became a rope, and then I tugged really hard on the rope and I discovered that it was attached to the entire universe.”
The Spirit Catches You

Lia Lee was born in 1982 in Merced County, California, the fourteenth child of Hmong immigrants Foua and Nao Kao, but the first to be born in the U.S. Though male children are traditionally favored among the Hmong, Lia was adored and the clear favorite of her parents. She had first seizure when she was just three months old. Her parents believed it was because her soul had been frightened, left her body and became lost after her sister slammed a door. Her seizure was what Hmong call qaug dab peg or “the spirit catches you and you fall down” (p. 20).

The spirit catches you. . . It could be said that Lia’s family was caught by surprise by both Lia’s illness and their convoluted journey through the U.S. medical system. For most ailments, Hmong immigrants typically favor seeing a txiv neeb, a Hmong healer. However, Lia’s parents brought her to the Merced County Medical Center (MCMC) when she had serious seizures. It wasn’t until their third trip into the emergency room when Lia was 8 months old that an epileptic seizure was observed by a physician. It was at this hospital that Foua and Nao Kao and Neil Ernst and Peggy Philp, a husband-wife pediatric team, began their relationship–all desiring a healthy little girl and each facing challenges of understanding one another and making the best care decisions for the same little girl.

Fadiman alternates chapters about Lia with chapters on the history and culture of the Hmong people. Interwoven in Lia’s story is the story of her people. The parallel can be drawn that the spirit catches the Hmong people with wars and threats of assimilation, and in response the Hmong eschew resistance and migrate. Most of Merced’s Hmong population came to the U.S. from Laos after the Vietnam War. While the author has done extensive research, still she is criticized by some who disagree with her portrayal of Hmong history. Mai Na M. Lee, a Hmong American, reviewed this book and confronts Fadiman for stereotyping Hmong people, albeit positively. Still, the book gives good context for the historical setting of the Hmong migration to the U.S. as well as portraying details illustrating both the breadth and depth of Hmong culture.
And You Fall Down

And you fall down. . . Cultures, parents, doctors—-they all fall down, with the child bearing the brunt of their shortcomings. Cross-cultural tensions are inevitable when medical care is needed and doctors and patient are from differing cultures. This is starkly illustrated by Lia’s five year ordeal to treat her seizures medically by the MCMC staff and traditionally by her family. Lia’s treating physicians ordered courses of medications, over 20 combinations over a five year period. Lia’s parents, knowing no English and not literate with either words or numbers, would sign consent to medical instructions without understanding. When medications prescribed for Lia had negative side effects or when Lia was not showing any ongoing signs of seizures, her parents would blame the medications and not administer them. At times, this led to further seizures, visits to MCMC, and further hospital procedures (like drawing blood) which were upsetting to Foua and Nao Kao.

A better approach, thought Lia’s parents, was “a little medicine and a little txib” (p. 110.) While medical care at MCMC was provided at no charge, Lia’s family spent large sums on buying amulets, having a tvix neeb perform ceremonies, and sacrificing chickens, pigs, and even a cow. Foua would grow herbs and make special concoctions both for feeding to Lia as well as bathing her. The author was privileged to be present when the family sacrificed a pig in their living room in order to seek her wandering soul and bring it back to Lia.

From the doctors’ perspective Neil Ernst said, “I felt it was important for these Hmongs to understand that there were certain elements of medicine that we understood better than they did and that there were certain rules they had to follow with their kids’ lives” (p. 59.) This clash—-primarily over lack of compliance in regard to Lia’s prescribed medications-—led to Lia being put into the foster care system for more than six months. She was returned when her parents demonstrated ability to comply with the medication regimen, which had been greatly simplified during the time she was in foster care.

Regardless of the best intentions of the medical doctors and the conscientious care of her parents, at five years old Lia Lee had an epileptic seizure so profound that even heroic measures had little effect. This was combined with an infection and septic shock, which brought Lia to the brink of death. Her parents had the support of Neil Ernst to take her off of life support and bring her home-—to die, thought the doctors; to care for, thought her parents. Against all odds, Lia survived, though in a persistent vegetative state. Her mother has cared for her since then as she would an infant, bathing her, spoon feeding her, even wearing her in a traditional Hmong baby carrier. As reported by Newsweek in 2005, Lia is still alive and being cared for by her mother.
Reflections

I have been the mother misunderstood by the medical establishment, struggling to communicate, and lacking the basic cultural assumptions that doctors and nurses expect me to have. When we lived in Ukraine my seven year old son became sick with pneumonia. While I was adept at navigating through my routine daily tasks, both culturally and linguistically, I found myself at a loss when it came to emergency medical care. My son was hospitalized in a children’s hospital in Ukraine—a hospital that did not have lights or toilet seats for the bathroom. The nurse yelled at me for not bringing toilet paper or slippers for my son. We were lined up with other mothers and children in a hall, and ushered through various breathing therapies, none of which were explained, many of which seemed to be based more on superstition than medical science. And while I knew the doctors were well-trained and showed compassion to my son and I, the nurses treated us with disdain. I struggled to understand the brisk Russian laced with medical terms, and when I asked for a phrase to be repeated, it was said just as fast, only louder. After twenty-four hours, I had recourse to a private, western-style hospital with English speaking staff. Lia’s mother and many other immigrants to the U.S. do not have that advantage.
Conclusion

The Spirit Catches You and You Fall Down was both thought-provoking and emotionally rewarding. It is recommend for those who enjoy a well-told story, as well as those working in public health fields, interested in cross-cultural transitions, or who have special interest in the Hmong people.

Anne Fadiman discussed Lia Lee with medical anthropologist Arthur Kleinman. His observations brings out the crucial point (p. 260), “You need to understand that as powerful an influence as the culture of the Hmong patient and her family is on this case, the culture of biomedicine is equally powerful. If you can’t see that your own culture has its own set of interests, emotions, and biases, how can you expect to deal successfully with someone else’s culture?”

“Our little systems have their day;
They have their day and cease to be:
They are but broken lights of Thee,
And Thou, O Lord, art more than they.”

–Alfred, Lord Tennyson

Honestly, the name of this book has always gotten on my nerves. Though I’ve started reading it several times, I haven’t yet finished it. I’m looking forward to reading and discussing it with other mothers, evaluating the ideas both in light of the Bible and practicality.

Feel free to join us! The discussion starts this coming Monday, April 23. I’ve found the book at my local library, as well as new at Amazon and used at Half.com.

Chapter 1
Chapter 2

The Betrothed

]]> http://www.tulipgirl.com/index.php/2007/02/poetry-for-boys/feed/ 7 http://www.tulipgirl.com/index.php/2007/01/dorothy-parker-on-drinking/ http://www.tulipgirl.com/index.php/2007/01/dorothy-parker-on-drinking/#comments Tue, 16 Jan 2007 02:26:34 +0000 TulipGirl http://www.tulipgirl.com/wordpress/index.php/2007/01/dorothy-parker-on-drinking/

I like to have a Martini
Two at the very most
After three I’m under the table
After four I’m under my host

–Dorothy Parker