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More on Michael and Debi Pearl

Meggan Judge, a mother in Alaska, wishes someone had stopped her from following Pearl's instruction sooner.

"Thirty times a day, I was striking my son. He wasn't even 2 years old," Judge said. "I kept waiting: Where is this joy we were promised?'"

She slowly gave up Pearl's methods three years ago after locking her son in his room one afternoon for fear that she would hurt him.

Years later, hearing of Lynn Paddock's story, Judge knows she's lucky. She suspects she could have been driven to such lengths if she hadn't met a community of other Christian mothers on the Internet who urged her to abandon Pearl's teachings.

"Without a doubt, I know I would have been capable of that," Judge said. "Anyone who says they wouldn't is a liar. I never knew I had anger issues until I started using his methods."

The NC News Observer has a feature on Michael and Debi Pearl, written by Mandy Locke, the reporter who has followed the Sean Paddock abuse/murder situation from the beginning.

While the Pearls declined to be interviewed, Mandy Locke has been very fair--and at times sympathetic--to them. Michael Pearl is the "a towering, rugged man with a fuzzy white beard that mesmerizes children." However, the article does go into some points of concern about the Pearls' teachings.

For further reading, I recommend the following resources.

Here at TulipGirl:
On the Pearls and Parenting
Pearls Po-Russki
Biblical Relationships or Behaviourism
Children, Good and Grown

On Perfectionism and the Pearls
A Switch or a Cross?
Authoritarianism and Isolationism Among Us (small type, worth the effort of reading)
The Pearls: The Basics, On Original Sin
To Train Up A Child Review
TTUAC: One Family's Experiences
Another Family's Experience
Chapter-by-Chapter Review of TTUAC
Avoiding Millstones
TTUAC Short Review


April 30, 2006  |  Comments (11)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



Our Budding Calvinist. . .

J9 asked Hubby tonight, "Are you a 5-point Calvinist?" He's reading a "theological novel"about basic Reformed theology.

That led to a brief discussion on infralapsarian and amyraldian views between the two of them.

Then J9 turned to me, "What about you?"

"Why do you think I'm called TulipGirl?"



April 29, 2006  |  Comments (12)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



New WHO Growth Charts

Via an e-mail from Ted Greiner, breastfeeding advocate, I heard that the World Health Organization has updated its infant and child growth charts. Greiner says, "Based on careful studies of breastfed babies living under "ideal" conditions in several countries, WHO has determined that they grow at similar rates and that this growth pattern is the ideal one. Thus they have issued a series of new growth charts. . . The previous international ones were based on how largely bottle fed American babies grew."

The new charts can be found here:
Child Growth Standards
WHO Child Growth Media Centre


April 28, 2006  |  Comments (2)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



Bedtime Boy Said

"The Germans and the Japanese don't."

"Don't what, honey?"

"The Germans and the Japanese don't have to go to bed at this certain hour."

(Conversation with C5, as he snuggled on my lap, moments before he drifted to sleep.)


April 27, 2006  |  Comments (4)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



Soccer Moms and Baseball Babies

"Play BALL!" It was the Little League T-ball All Stars game. I was number 17--the littlest on the team and the last to bat. I glanced into the stands, and was reassured to see my mother smiling at me and nursing my baby sister.

I wrote about these vivid and early memories of my mother and little sister a few years ago.

Just today, I came across this article by Elizabeth Pantley and marvelled at how these early interactions among mother, baby, and siblings can make such a profound impression. And how love and nurturing are passed along in our every day family interactions.

My three older children all play baseball, so Coleton and I spend much of our springtime at the ballpark. His first baseball season he was five months old. Since I was a coach on my daughterís team, Coleton spent his time in the dugout and on the field nestled in his (team-colored) sling, watching the action and listening to the cheers, chants and noise of the play. Between swings at bat the girls would often pass him around from one to the other, entertaining him and trying to make him giggle.

I encourage you to take time for some mommy-daddy encouragement by reading Baseball Babies and Play Ball.

(Reposted from March 2004, because my boys are now playing neighborhood baseball.)


April 27, 2006  |  Comments (1)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



Gas Temperature Map

Gas prices as hot where you are as they are where I am?

Comparing Gas Prices
Comparing Gas Prices, Take 2

(Via Seven Realms)


April 25, 2006  |  Comments (6)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



My First WIC Conference

I just registered for the PCA 2006 Women in the Church Conference. I found out this morning that a group of women from our home church in St. Pete will be attending together and the early bird registration ends next Monday. I was just talking with Hubby about it earlier this week, so he told me, "You want to--why don't you just go?"

This will be my first WIC conference. I'm kinda hopeful that some of the women I've known from MTW will be there. . . I miss the MTW community.

Anyway. . . If any of y'all are planning on going, let me know! We'll have coffee.


April 23, 2006  |  Comments (13)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



Oh, crap!

"Oh, crap!" I heard my 8 year old say, as we drove down the road in the minivan the other day. Shocked me a bit. Haven't heard him use language like that before.

His expletive was followed by some banging, and sounds of paper being rumpled, and a book being slammed shut.

"What's going on?"

"Those stupid guys are whalehunting again. And they killed the whale already."

T8 is reading an illustrated version of Moby Dick. T8, my whale lover, budding marine biologist. He has a great sensitivity to injustices, chief of which is whale hunting.

A few days later he told me, "You know what I'd do if I were a millionaire?"

"No, what?"

"I wouldn't be foolish with my money. I'd buy a big house and get a wife and a bunch of kids. But I wouldn't just buy them every toy they wanted. And I'd work at the aquarium. If I couldn't work with the whales, well, then I'd just be the guy that feeds the sharks."


April 23, 2006  |  Comments (8)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



Westminster Shorter Catechism, Question 5

Q. 5. Are there more Gods than one?

A. There is but one only, the living and true God.

but one only
Deuteronomy 6:4, Isaiah 44:6, Isaiah 45:21-22, 1 Corinthians 8:4-6

living and true God
Jeremiah 10:10, John 17:3, 1 Thessalonians 1:9, 1 John 5:20

(via OPC/CRTA)


April 23, 2006  |  Comments (1)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



For the Beauty of the Earth / Earth Day 2006

For the beauty of the earth,
for the glory of the skies,
for the love which from our birth
over and around us lies;
Lord of all, to thee we raise
this our hymn of grateful praise.

For the beauty of each hour
of the day and of the night,
hill and vale, and tree and flower,
sun and moon, and stars of light;
Lord of all, to thee we raise
this our hymn of grateful praise.

For the joy of ear and eye,
for the heart and mind's delight,
for the mystic harmony,
linking sense to sound and sight;
Lord of all, to thee we raise
this our hymn of grateful praise.

For the joy of human love,
brother, sister, parent, child,
friends on earth and friends above,
for all gentle thoughts and mild;
Lord of all, to thee we raise
this our hymn of grateful praise.

For thy church, that evermore
lifteth holy hands above,
offering up on every shore
her pure sacrifice of love;
Lord of all, to thee we raise
this our hymn of grateful praise.

For thyself, best Gift Divine,
to the world so freely given,
for that great, great love of thine,
peace on earth, and joy in heaven:
Lord of all, to thee we raise
this our hymn of grateful praise.

Lyrics: Folliot S. Pierpoint

This hymn is special to me because of my mother. I didn't know it until she asked that I learn to play it. I took several years of piano lessons. Squirmed during practice, back always ached, had trouble concentrating. But I loved playing from my hymns in easy arrangements book. The church we attended at that time didn't include hymns in Sunday service very often. But I would play them, all the verses, singing under my breath.

I'm posting it today for its praise of our Lord of Creation, who provides our sustenance, relationships, and sanctification.


April 22, 2006  |  Comments (4)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



For Birth and Fertility Junkies

The Illustrated Cervix

(Thanks, BetsyPage!)


April 20, 2006  |  Comments (3)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



Pediatric Nurse Discards Babywise

We followed the advice on feeding and sleep schedules very closely, until my 5 week old son began failing to gain weight. Fortunately I am a pediatric nurse and noticed the early signs before his health was severely affected. I visited a lactation consultant and learned that my milk supply was almost gone. . .

I dismissed the idea that his feeding problems could be related to the Babywise program (I don't know what I was thinking!) and continued with the program.

Read more from this pediatric nurse and former Babywise mom.

Several people influenced us in our decision to use the Ezzo parenting ideas--one was a NICU nurse. I trusted that the materials were medically sound because they were from her, even though they went against much of what I had learned about breastfeeding and early infant development before then.

Read more Voices of Experience from families leaving behind Ezzo parenting.

(Via Ezzo.Info)

Tags: , , , , ,


April 17, 2006  |  Comments (9)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



Your Ecological Footprint?

I took this Earth Footprint quiz primarily to compare our lifestyle in the US with how we lived in Ukraine.

Our eco-footprint in Ukraine? 2.4
In Florida? 12

I think the Florida one might be a tad low, considering our water and electrical consumption. But the biggest factor in the difference, I believe, is due to transportation.

In Ukraine, we did not own a car. We primarily used public transportation. When the family went out all together, we'd take a taxi--seven people in a little sedan. I walked to the market or the grocery store, where I purchased mainly locally grown or processed foods. (Unlike most of our Ukrainian friends, I also indulged in imported items. Trust me, luxuries like boxed cereal and frozen veggies in winter were much appreciated there.)

Now, I don't have any destinations within walking distance, aside from the park. We have two vehicles, and put quite a lot of miles on them each week. We do have electrical conservation appliances and try to limit our AC use to when its really hot--but this is Florida, and it is hot a lot. In Ukraine, energy conservation bulbs and appliances were unavailable. And the heating/hot water system was woefully inefficient (even though for our apartment, we did enjoy the endless supply of hot water! Except when it was turned off in the summer. . .)

Anyway, I haven't looked through the whole site, and I'm prone to be skeptical of some of the things I've seen there. However, it's a good reminder to be mindful of our consumption and lifestyle habits, and how they impact the world and people around us.

(Via Suburban TreeHugger)


April 17, 2006  |  Comments (7)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



He is Risen!

Hear the bells ringing
They're singing that you can be born again
Hear the bells ringing
They're singing Christ is risen from the dead

The angel up on the tombstone
Said He has risen, just as He said
Quickly now, go tell his disciples
That Jesus Christ is no longer dead

Joy to the word, He has risen, hallelujah
He's risen, hallelujah
He's risen, hallelujah

Hear the bells ringing
They're singing that you can be healed right now
Hear the bells ringing, they're singing
Christ, He will reveal it now

The angels, they all surround us
And they are ministering Jesus' power
Quickly now, reach out and receive it
For this could be your glorious hour

Joy to the world, He has risen, hallelujah
He's risen, hallelujah
He's risen, hallelujah, hallelujah

The angel up on the tombstone
Said He has risen, just as He said
Quickly now, go tell his disciples
That Jesus Christ is no longer dead

Joy to the world, He has risen, hallelujah
He's risen, hallelujah
He's risen, hallelujah

Lyrics by Keith Green


April 16, 2006  |  Comments (6)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



One Year

This is where I would insert a post reflecting on what life and the Lord has brought us in the past year. One year ago today, we stepped back onto US soil. One year ago was the ending of our life in Ukraine. Understandably, I've been a bit emotional today. Contemplative.

And I can't quite bring myself to blog on it beyond this.

But I do want to thank everyone who has prayed for us, supported us, encouraged us--both in our time in Ukraine and our time in the States.


April 15, 2006  |  Comments (5)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



O Sacred Head Now Wounded

O sacred Head, now wounded,
With grief and shame weighed down,
Now scornfully surrounded
With thorns, Thine only crown;
O sacred Head, what glory
What bliss ítil now was Thine
Yet though despised and gory
I joy to call Thee mine

What Thou, my Lord, hast suffered,
Was all for sinnersí gain;
Mine, mine was the transgression,
But Thine the deadly pain.
Lo, here I fall, my Savior!
íTis I deserve Thy place;
Look on me with Thy favor,
Vouchsafe me to Thy grace.

The joy can never be spoken,
Above all joys beside,
When in Thy body broken
I thus with safety hide.
My Lord of Life, desiring
Thy glory now to see,
Beside Thy cross expiring,
Iíd breathe my soul to Thee.

What language shall I borrow
To praise Thee, heavenly friend,
For this my dying sorrow,
Thy pity without end?
Lord make me Thine forever,
Nor let me faithless prove
Oh let me never, never
Abuse such dying love

Forbid that I should leave Thee
O Jesus leave not me!
By faith I would receive Thee
Thy blood can make me free
When strength and comfort languish
And I must hence depart
Release me then from anguish
By Thine own wounded heart

Be near when I am dying
Oh show Thy cross to me
And for my succor flying
Come Lord and set me free
These eyes new faith receiving
From Jesus shall not move
For he who dies believing
Dies safely, through Thy love

Bernard of Clairvaux

Public Domain


April 14, 2006  |  Comments (4)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



Walk Softly

toe foo

I want these shoes. They're from Green Toe line of Simple Shoes, minimizing the ecological footprint left by shoes.

I bet the Manolo, he would approve.


April 13, 2006  |  Comments (7)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



Kitchen Wives

Well said, as usual, Rebecca.

I recommend reading Kitchen Wives in order:
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3

I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want, (whether up to my elbows in dirty dishes or not?) I can do everything through him who gives me strength. from Philippians 4


April 12, 2006  |  Comments (1)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



On Perfectionism and Parenting


I read what Ann writes on perfectionism, parenting, and the Pearls. I understand her heart, her experiences. I know the need to lean more into the Gospel, for myself and my children.

And I say, Amen.

I encourage all parents, regardless of faith background or parenting approach, to read Ann's post.

Along the lines of Ann's post, is Spunky's post A Switch or a Cross? Ann and other are involved in the comments, which are worth reading through and provide food for thought and reflections.

And to further understand how mamas are drawn to the Pearls' materials and then realize their harm, I recommend reading nutmeggmama's story and Anne's story.


April 10, 2006  |  Comments (5)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



Westminster Shorter Catechism, Question 4

Q. 4. What is God?

A. God is a Spirit, infinite, eternal, and unchangeable in his being, wisdom, power, holiness, justice, goodness, and truth.

is a Spirit
Deuteronomy 4:15-19, Luke 24:39, John 1:18, John 4:24, Acts 17:29

1 Kings 8:27, Psalm 139:7-10, Psalm 145:3, Psalm 147:5, Jeremiah 23:24, Romans 11:33-36

Deuteronomy 33:27, Psalm 90:2, Psalm 102:12, 24-27, Revelation 1:4, 8

unchangeable Psalm 33:11, Malachi 3:6, Hebrews 1:12, Hebrews 6:17-18, Hebrews 13:8, James 1:17

in his being
Exodus 3:14, Psalm 115:2-3, 1 Timothy 1:17, 1 Timothy 6:15-16

Psalm 104:24, Romans 11:33-34, Hebrews 4:13

Genesis 17:1, Psalm 62:11, Jeremiah 32:17, Matthew 19:26, Revelation 1:8

Hebrews 1:13, 1 Peter 1:15-16, 1 John 3:3, 5, Revelation 15:4.

Genesis 18:25, Exodus 34:6-7, Deuteronomy 32:4, Psalm 96:13, Romans 3:5, 26

Psalm 103:5, Psalm 107:8, Matthew 19:7, Romans 2:4

and truth
Exodus 34:6, Deuteronomy 32:4, Psalm 86:15, Psalm 117:2, Hebrews 6:18

(via OPC/CRTA)


April 09, 2006  |  Comments (3)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



Of Books and Bands Unheard Of

So I went to the local Christian bookstore tonight. . . I like it, in spite of some of the cheesiness that is inevitable these days in Christian bookstores. It helps that a manager there goes to our neighborhood PCA and consciously stocks books I'd like to buy.

Anyway, there's a systematic theology I've heard about. While I adore Berkof, I wanted to get another perspective as well. I couldn't remember the authors name. "Grudem?" asked Skip.
"Nooo. . ."
"Oh, Reymond?"

He showed me to the last one in stock. Yikes. I forgot the price tags that come along with books like that. I bought it anyway, thanks justifying that I might not get a 20% off coupon from Skip again, and that my folks sent me a birthday check a few weeks ago. (That birthday money also bought me new jammies. And a couple trips to the local coffee shop. And a few other things. It's the gift that keeps on giving. Or at least, keeps on letting me find room in the budget for splurge buys. . . *L*)

After that I wandered back to the music section. While I've enjoyed a wide range of music through the years, I've only allowed myself to be called a fan of The Choir. They recently released a new album. I couldn't find it. I asked the guy in the music section where I'd find it.

"The Choir? That's the group?"
"Yes, The Choir. O How the Mighty Have Fallen."
"Do you mean the Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir?"
"No. Just The Choir."
"Hmmm. . . They must be an older group."
"You've never heard of The Choir? They're classic. Mid-80s SoCal alternative Christian pioneers?"
"No. . ."

I was shaking my head. The music "expert" for the store had never heard of The Choir. And I was feeling my age. Especially after his, "They must be an older group" comment. I had picked up "At the Foot of the Cross" and asked him if he was familiar with that. He was. I pointed out that Steve Hindalong was the producer, Steve Hindalong the lyricist and percussionist for the Choir. Blank look.

He looked it up on the computer. That store had never ordered, stocked, or sold a single Choir CD. The mind boggles. I told him he had to order something, just for his own listening edification.

I guess I'll just order it directly from Dan, Derri, and Steve. I bet this birthday check could stretch infinitely.

Remind me one day of swooning around Steve's parents and my "I'm a greedy little monkey" story.


April 08, 2006  |  Comments (12)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



A rod is a rod is a rod?

It's just a little plastic tubing. . .

Rod/Shebet Study
Islam and "the Rod"
Our Homeschool: The Rod
Reading into the Rod Verses


April 07, 2006  |  Comments (4)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



For Katherine, On Her Birthday

Katherine Harris, this tribute wouldn't have been possible without you.

(Via Lana)


April 05, 2006  |  Comments (0)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



Westminster Shorter Catechism, Question 3

Q. 3. What do the Scriptures principally teach?

A. The Scriptures principally teach what man is to believe concerning God, and what duty God requires of man.

what man is to believe concerning God
Genesis 1:1; John 5:39; John 20:31; Romans 10:17; 2 Timothy 3:15

what duty God requires of man
Deuteronomy 10:12-13; Joshua 1:8; Psalm 119:105; Micah 6:8; 2 Timothy 3:16-17

(via OPC/CRTA)


April 02, 2006  |  Comments (10)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink




Isn't that a great word? Saw it for the first time today, used by Tracy. It may be an obvious word, but it's usage is new to me.


April 01, 2006  |  Comments (3)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



52 Things You Were Just Aching to Know About Me

From Kim to Kim to me. . .

1. FIRST NAME? Tulip. No, really. Did you expect me to use a nom de plume all this time and just give out my given name? If you really, really insist upon knowing, I know you won't have too much trouble figuring it out.

2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? My first name is a derived from my grandmother's maiden name. And my middle name is my mother's maiden name. When I was in sixth grade, my Jamaican bus driver's name was Miller. I felt such kinship, since my middle name was Miller, too.

3. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY? Tonight. I'm feeling awfully sentimental and enjoying a nice glass of wine.

4. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? It's okay. A mixture of D'Nealian and Italic, and not very neat. My o's look like e's.


6. KIDS? 4 boys.

7. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Maybe. I just don't know if we'd ever call each other.

8. DO YOU HAVE A JOURNAL? Now, a blog. And notes in my daytimer. But not the daily journal, prayer journal, and dream journal I used to keep before I was married.

9. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? More than before I was married. *wink*


11. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Nope. Don't like heights. But one of our fave dates used to be to go sit on the bleachers and talk while we watched other jump.

12. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? I don't eat breakfast very often, and cereal usually only when I steal a bite from the kiddos.


14. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Depends upon the challenge, I'm a lot less strong, in person, than I idealized myself as. . .

15. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Toss up--Baskin Robbins Chocolate Mousse Royale or Breyers Cokiees and Cream.

16. SHOE SIZE? 8 1/2.

17. RED OR PINK? Neither. Remind me one day to tell the story of the pink trauma I suffered in 7th grade.

18. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? I don't measure up to my ideals.

19. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? My Mom(IL) and sister(AZ).

20. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU? I'd love anyone who wants to do this to put it up and mentioned it in the comments.

21. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES YOU ARE WEARING? Multicolored sarong and barefoot.

22. LAST THING YOU ATE? Parmesean goldfish and sauvingnon blanc wine.



25. FAVORITE SMELL? After the rain.

26. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? A friend with whom I went to the beach this week


28. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? I adore both Kim and Kim, and have known them and respected each of them over the years.

29. FAVORITE DRINK? Coffee. Right now, iced coffee.

30. FAVORITE SPORT? Watching my monkeys at baseball practice.

31. HAIR COLOR? blondish-brownish-reddish

32. EYE COLOR? Greenish blue.


34. FAVORITE FOOD? Lately, brie and feta


36. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Curious George


38. SUMMER OR WINTER? summer


40. FAVORITE DESSERT? Any kind of rich cake with a ganache frosting


42. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? I would have thought I was least likely, but. . .

43. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING? The Child in Christian Though, Bunge; Berkhof's Systematic Theology, (like Kim! *L*); Banished Knowledge, Alice Miller; Psalms

44. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? Don't have one. There is a nice, smooth spot on my wooden desk.


46. FAVORITE SOUNDS? the ocean waves

47. ROLLING STONE OR BEATLES? It's a toss up. And I know there are only two kinds of people. . .


49. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? birthin' babies, listening to cranky people and helping them feel heard without taking it personally

50. WHEN AND WHERE WERE YOU BORN? March 24th, Jefferson Parish Hospital, Metairie, LA

51. WHAT CONDITION ARE YOUR HANDS AND FEET IN? Feet, used. Hands, nice. Nails, natural.

52. WHO IS YOUR FAVOURITE AUTHOR? While she hasn't written my favorite books, I love the way Madeliene L'Engle uses the English language.

Links to other 52 things lists:
Tracy at The Secret of Living
Kim at Living a Full Life
Janet at Wonderfully Terrifying
CEP at What A Rummy Nation
Meggan at What's Good, What's True
Krista at Colorado Mountains

Sweetpea at Daily Life

Joe at Jungle Pop

Hey--all the cool kids are doing it. . . C'mon. . .


April 01, 2006  |  Comments (11)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



Monty Python's Long Lost Cousin?

In this long-lost footage of a Monty Python's Flying Circus interview, Terry Jones reminds me of my little brother.

(via Katie's Beer)


April 01, 2006  |  Comments (0)  |  TrackBack (0)  |  Permalink



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